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By Swinggcat - author of Real World Seduction
I'm gonna go out
on a limb and guess you're reading this because you want more success
with women, right? Maybe your skills with da ladies put Hugh Hefner to
shame. Maybe you're barley treading above water in the single scene
trenches. I dunno? But I do know you want more success. Who doesn't?
Just
maybe you think the best way to succeed with a woman is to NOT mess up
by, for example, avoiding topics of conversation that might offend her,
hiding aspects about yourself she may find dorky or crass or
pathetic...and so on, yes? If this describes you, don't worry. You're
not alone. Ninety percent of men think this way. Heck, I used to (If
you're one of those few lucky men who DON'T think this way, what you're
about to read will make you sigh with relief and think to yourself:
"Amen. Finally someone has the gall to stand up to the plate and spout
what should have been said a long time ago. If I'd been privy to this
when I was starting out, I'd have saved truckloads of time and tears.").
When
I first started wading through the single scene brush, slogging down a
misguided road, I thought to myself: "Why is it that the most
successful guys with women I know seem to do everything wrong?"
The
harder I tried NOT to mess up, the worse I did. I wanted to be flawless
but "flawless" was becoming a death sentence to my success with women.
Many blows to my self-esteem later, I realized I was trudging down the
wrong path.
But I didn't know what the right path was. I felt frustrated and confused.
Then the universe left a few breadcrumbs for me, pointing me in the right direction...
I was watching one of the old Superman movies with my little cousin
when it dawned on me. As I was watching I realized: If Superman didn't
have kryptonite he wouldn't have superhero appeal. His powers are
impressive but it's his Achilles heel, kryptonite, making him truly
extraordinary.
If you're perceptive, maybe you're saying to
yourself: "His Achilles heel makes him a hero because it humanizes him.
It conveys that although he has impressive powers, he's not that
different from us. We can relate to him."
But this is only part of the story. There are other underlying mechanisms at work.
One
of them dawned on me while perusing a book called "The Handicap
Principle," by the zoologist Amotz Zahavi. Many of us were told in
school that the animals advertising signals - displaying
characteristics about themselves - most fit for survival are picked by
the opposite sex as mating partners.
But Zahavi felt a piece of
Darwin's puzzle was missing: Why do animals go out of their way to
advertise costly signals - characteristics about themselves that
decrease their chance of survival?
Because, Zahavi tells us, the
opposite sex feels the greatest amount of attraction toward those
advertising the most costly signals. The peahen, for example, feels
attraction toward the peacock with the largest, most colorful plumage.
This large, colorful plumage is no perk for survival. The poor peacock
has to lug around those monster-sized feathers. His bright colors make
him stick out like a sore thumb to predators.
Yet the message
he's communicating to the peahen is: "Despite having these debilitating
characteristics, I'm alive, healthy, and ready to mate." He's
advertising costly signals.
These same principles apply to humans
as well. Anything you do that is perceived as potentially harmful to
your social status or chances of mating with a woman is advertising a
costly signal. If you advertise costly signals correctly it will
skyrocket both your social status and the attraction women feel toward
you.
A word of caution: Acting like a dilapidated gimp who just
got off the short bus will neither increase your social status nor
compel women to feel attraction toward you.
Advertising costly
signals only works on the condition that you've already established
yourself as the Prize with a woman (or group of women). Also, use it in
moderation. Less, in this case, really is more.
Let's look at a
few examples of this. Every few years there's some pop star that starts
sporting a dry heave inducing fashion. Butinstead of being shipped off
to some leper colony, his popularity soars and his grotesque style
becomes the new chic.
Another great example of this is the 1987
movie "Can't Buy Me Love." The movie's hapless hero, Donald, is
determined to squelch his dork-boy reputation by paying a popular
cheerleader to be his girlfriend. Lo and behold, his mission is
accomplished as he darts to the top of the popularity totem pole. As
prom edges closer Donald attempts to teach himself to dance by
imitating the dance moves of what he mistakenly thinks is the
television show American Bandstand. What he, unfortunately, ends up
learning are the steps to an African Anteater Ritual. When he gets to
prom, thinking he has all the trendy dance moves down pat, he busts out
with the African Anteater Ritual. Do people make fun of him? Nope. They
love him more for it. And in the next scene a whole room of teenagers
spaz out in synchronicity as they partake in the African Anteater
ritual.
These last two examples, admittedly, aren't about
attracting women per se. They're about the much broader field of human
psychology. Yet these same underlying mechanisms apply to attracting
women.
Many guys have a harder time dealing with a woman feeling
attraction toward them than one who doesn't. They shudder with fear
that they'll mess up their chances with her. She'll find out what a
goofball they are and never want to talk to them again. And most of the
time the woman does stop feeling attraction toward them. But it usually
has nothing to with them acting like goofballs. Instead, it's their
fear that she WON'T approve of their behavior that turns her off. Women
feel no attraction toward approval seeking, validation hungry, needy
men.
They feel attraction toward men whom establish themselves as
the Prize. If a woman, for example, wants to keep talking to you or
keep interacting with you or see you again or find out more about you
or try to get your approval or win you over...and so on, you've
probably established yourself as the Prize - at least to some extent.
Establishing
yourself as the Prize is what I call "Prizability." Advertising costly
signals is one of the best ways to skyrocket your Prizability.
Maybe,
for example, while out on a date with a woman you've just met, she
comments that your favorite musician is an untalented loser. Your gut
instinct shouts: "Don't let her know he's your favorite artist, lest
she stops liking you." This is the needy part of you. When women sense
this part of you, they see you as desperate to mate and spread your
genetic code.
But when you advertise a costly signal - by, for
example, saying, "Actually he's my favorite musician. I've been to
every single one of his concerts and have a big poster of him taped to
a wall in my bedroom. You must have bad taste." - you're establishing
that you're willing to risk losing the attraction she feels toward you
because you could care less what the end result is.
Women aren't
used to men doing this. Often times, they'll respond by, oddly enough,
changing their view to fit yours - an indication your Prizability is
rapidly increasing. Sometimes not. Yet, no matter what her response is,
you can use it to increase your Prizability (in my course you'll
discover truckloads of secrets for using her response - no matter what
it is - to exponentially increase your Prizability...emotionally
compelling her to want and reach and chase for more of you).
Before
I let you go I'm gonna share one more example of advertising costly
signals to increase your Prizability and skyrocket the attraction women
feel toward YOU. If there's a woman who feels attraction toward you,
advertise a costly signal by making her participate in a really dork
laden activity. Maybe grab her hand and start skipping and humming the
theme song to Mr. Roger's Neighborhood. Insist she participate. If she
already likes you, doing this will balloon your Prizability and the
attraction she feels toward you.
I've only scratched the surface
of advertising costly signals. My book is filled with heaps of
step-by-step examples, teaching you how to make this skill part of who
YOU are. You'll learn to transform aspects about yourself you perceive
as unattractive into your most seductive qualities. But this, my
friend, is only the tip of the iceberg. If you give me fifteen minutes
a day, I'll let you crawl inside my mind and pull out my proven
step-by-step attraction method...giving you the tools to generate
massive attraction in women, compelling them to want and reach and
chase for more of you. This is the fastest available road to success
with the women you desire...with minimum rejection. Even if you
dedicate little time and put in only a small amount of effort, you'll
start seeing results. Of course, the more you put in the more you'll
get out. I'll leave it up to you to decide just how much success with
women you want. But I should warn you: My course is the only place on
the planet you'll get possession of these attraction secrets. Just
think what it will be like to finally have the skills and confidence to
plop your butt in the driver's seat while interacting with women,
giving you the power and choice to take your interactions with them in
the direction you want. Start getting this area of your life taken care
of right now by downloading my book.
Real World Seduction
Your Loyal Dating Coach,
Swinggcat
"Dr. of Attraction"
Copyright
2005 Superior Living Inc. All rights reserved.
"Swinggcat" and
"RealWorldSeduction" are trademarks of Superior Living Inc.
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